Talk:Indus OS
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Promotional language concerns
[edit]@SJK:, @Vinit88: Please discuss the promotional language concerns. Blackmane (talk) 03:37, 29 June 2016 (UTC)
Hi @SJK: & @Blackmane: Thank you for starting this talk. This is my first article on Wikipedia and I am still learning Wikipedia's features. Please help me understand exactly what concerns you have with the language in this article and I will change it. I have written this article using all the available sources and referenced it to the right article as well. On another note, I do not understand why SJK keeps referring to this OS as a multi-lingual operating system. I dont think being multi-lingual is the USP of this OS & as per my understanding and according to Indus OS' website; this OS has lesser number of languages (12) as compared to most other smartphone operating systems such as Windows (50), iOS (40) & Android (32) which support more than 12 languages. A lot of online sources that I read mentioned Indus OS as a regional operating system including this TechCrunch article (https://techcrunch.com/2016/01/18/indus-os-series-a-10-million/) and when I read about the features of the OS on their website, It came to my notice that the OS has some features which are really meant for the Indian regional language audience who may not be well versed with the English language. Please help me improve the quality of the article. Thanks. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Vinit88 (talk • contribs) 08:41, 29 June 2016 (UTC)
- I had a stab at doing some copy editing of the article, but had some time constraints. As for promotional language, WP:PEACOCK would be a good resource to start from. An example of quite 'peacocky' language is
Indus OS’s technology team has developed the world’s first regional Operating System made especially for the regional language user.
While on the surface it is a reasonable sounding sentence, but placed in context concerning a product then it is very much the sort of language one sees on an advertising pamphlet. Another example isThe operating system's regional app marketplace, App Bazaar, is the fastest growing one in the world
. In both cases, there would be ways of rewording to remove the promotional tone without affecting the message. As it's quite late here and I'm committed to a copy edit request I may not have the time over the next couple of days to delve deeply into this, but will certainly be available if you wish to drop a message on my talk page. - Also, here is a pointer on how to sign your messages. Either type 4 tildes like this ~~~~ or click the signature button which is in the top left corner of the editing window. Blackmane (talk) 15:41, 29 June 2016 (UTC)
- And one more thing, @Vinit88:, to use the ping function, you need to do the ping, the edit and sign all in one go. If you go back and edit the post to put the ping in, it doesn't work. Blackmane (talk) 15:43, 29 June 2016 (UTC)